


regret

by peter_parkerson



Series: Febuwhump 2019 [22]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Bullying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Febuwhump 2019, Gen, Guilt, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Regret, Whump, idk what this one is tbh im really sleepy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-02-23
Packaged: 2019-11-04 05:42:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17892587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peter_parkerson/pseuds/peter_parkerson
Summary: Febuwhump Day 22: regretThe kid’s annoying.It’s a fact. The kid talks too much, too fast, and it’s annoying. That’s just how it is.He wishes that was a good excuse for ignoring the calls. And the texts. And the incessant, unnecessarily long voicemails. He wishes he'd kept a closer eye on the kid because then maybe he wouldn't have missed his own Homecoming to fight his date's dad. He wishes his negligence hadn't indirectly caused a world of trauma for a high school sophomore.He can't fix it now, but he can at least try to make amends.Peter seems like a pretty forgiving kid.





	regret

**Author's Note:**

> day 22 of febuwhump (can be found here https://spidersonangst.tumblr.com/post/181695744243/hey-guys-since-i-love-sleeplessly-reading-about)

The kid’s annoying.

  
  
It’s a fact. The kid talks too much, too fast, and it’s annoying. That’s just how it is. 

  
  
He wishes that was a good excuse for ignoring the calls. And the texts. And the incessant, unnecessarily long voicemails. He wishes he'd kept a closer eye on the kid because then maybe he wouldn't have missed his own Homecoming to fight his date's dad. He wishes his negligence hadn't indirectly caused a world of trauma for a high school sophomore. 

  
  
He can't fix it now, but he can at least try to make amends. 

  
  
Peter seems like a pretty forgiving kid.    
  


 

* * *

  
  
He starts out small. Proper greetings when Peter gets into the backseat of the car, asking him how school was, letting him ramble on about decathlon practice or chemistry or his friends or...whatever he's talking about. Happy's not really listening, but he hasn't put up the divider either. Progress.   


 

He can almost think of Peter's voice as background noise, if he focuses hard enough on the road. Peter doesn't seem to need much input from him, anyway, so as long as he gives a hum or a nod every once in a while, the kid's content to just talk.    


 

Happy drives and Peter talks.    


 

And it works. Peter's smiling, so that's something. Guilt still gnaws at his insides, even as Peter chatter animatedly about the new LEGO set his best friend, whose name Happy can't remember, just got. They're not close, not by a long shot, but they're okay enough.   
  


 

* * *

  
  
After Germany, Peter usually calls Tony when there's a problem. Tony is mentoring him now, something Happy never thought he'd live to see - Tony Stark with a kid. Not because he didn't think Tony would be good with a kid, but because he never thought Tony would settle enough to have one. Which, technically, he still hasn't, but who is he kidding?    


 

Most of the calls he gets from Peter, now, are just patrol reports. He doesn't give them every time anymore, but Tony insists that he still gives them whenever something major or out of the ordinary happens.    


 

After Germany, Happy listens to every voicemail. No matter how long, how uninteresting, how tangential, Happy listens to all of them. Sometimes Peter actually has a cool story or a funny anecdote - the time he fought a guy in a hot dog costume who tried to steal cash from a taco stand because he was bitter that their mascot had a better suit than him sticks out. Other times, it's just Peter telling him about how he helped a kid find her dog or something in that vein.    


 

It's sort of endearing, in a way. The voicemails, as much as he hates to admit it, are nice to listen to. And it's nice to get an update, outside of the weekly lab visits, on how Peter's doing. It's nice to get semi-regular confirmation that the kid is, in fact, still alive.

 

He brings up a story from one of the more recent voicemails one day, because Peter got cut off by his aunt in the middle of his retelling, and Happy's kind of curious as to what came next.

 

  
"Hey, what happened with that guy you were following the other day? The one you thought was stalking that girl."

 

Peter stops in the middle of his sentence. There's a level of surprise on his face that Happy doesn't like. "I - what?"

  
  
Glancing between the road and Peter in the rearview mirror, Happy says, "From the voicemail. Last...Tuesday, I think? Something like that."

  
  
Peter's mouth opens and closes like a fish for a solid twenty seconds. Happy's starting to wonder if he said something wrong when Peter practically chokes out, "You - you listen to the voicemails?"

  
  
It's a fair question. Happy hates that it is, but it's fair. He's not shocked that Peter still assumes he doesn't listen to the patrol reports, because he didn't before and letting the kid ramble in the car isn't going to change Peter's whole perception of him. 

  
  
He didn't do it right the first time, but he'll get it the second time around. He's not going to let the kid down again.

 

"Yeah, I listen to them," he says, gruffly. Peter nods slowly in the backseat, eyes wide. There's way too much awkwardness going on here. "So are you gonna finish the story?"

  
  
"O-oh, yeah, sure. So it turns out he  _ was _ stalking her..."   
  


 

* * *

  
  
It's not until Peter steps into the car with possibly the saddest look Happy has ever seen on anyone other than Tony or Rhodey that their relationship really clicks.

  
  
Peter slides into the backseat, unceremoniously dropping his backpack at his feet, and promptly leans his head against the window and closes his eyes without so much as a hello.

  
  
Wrong. There's so much wrong here and he haven't even started driving yet.

  
  
"The hell happened to you?" Happy asks, realizes belatedly that maybe he should've waited for Peter to speak up. Or just let him talk to Tony instead, since they're actually close. Or at least been a little more gentle about asking. Too late now.   


 

Bleary eyes drag over to him. The kid picks at a loose thread on his jeans and mumbles, "Nothing. M'fine."

  
  
"And I'm Iron Man." He gets no reaction. Jesus. "Kid. Did someone say something to you? Or is this like - like a PTSD thing or -"

  
  
"What do you care?" There's no real bite to it. Just tired resignation.

  
  
It might be worse. Peter's not even angry about it - Happy wonder, sometimes, if anger is even in Peter's vocabulary - he's just accepted that Happy doesn't like him and never will.   


  
God, he's an asshole.

  
  
He doesn't  _ not _ like the kid. He's never really  _ not _ liked the kid. Peter's annoying, yes, and likely will never stop being annoying, but it's in the same way that a younger brother is annoying. Like whenever he speaks, Happy wants him to shut up, but when he actually does, it feels like something's missing. He didn't get that part, before, because Peter never actually did seem to shut up, but he gets it now.

  
  
And he does care. He never wanted to, but the kid's grown on him. Apparently, he's good at that.

  
  
"Peter - look, I'm sorry for not answering your calls," he says, and he really is. "I'm sorry I didn't take you seriously. I know I've been a dick, but I'm...trying to make up for it, okay? So if you don't want to tell but, then fine, whatever, but you - you can, if you want."

  
  
He's met with silence.

  
  
Okay. He deserves this.    


 

Happy puts the car in drive and pulls out of the school parking lot. Regret stirs in his stomach once again.   
  
  


 

* * *

 

  
  
They're halfway through the drive when Peter says, "There's this guy at school."

  
  
He leaves it hanging there, still staring out the window as the city flies by outside. Happy's not quite sure if  _ guy at school _ means a bully or a crush, but the way Peter says it has him leaning toward bully. 

  
  
"Uh huh?" Happy prompts, keeping his eyes fixed on the road. He's always hated having people stare at him when he's upset.

  
  
Peter doesn't speak for another two minutes. Happy's starting to think he's not going to when he slows to a stop at a red light and Peter pulls away from the window. "He's an asshole. He - he calls me  _ Penis Parker _ and says I'm not smart enough to be on the decathlon team and acts like I ran over his dog just because I'm a starter and he's not."

  
  
Does  _ starter _ mean the same thing on decathlon as it does in sports? Probably. Happy doesn't really think the specifics are that important here anyway. 

  
  
Now that he's thinking about it, he's pretty sure Tony mentioned something about Peter having a bully once or twice before.    


 

"I can talk to him if you want. Man-to-man."

 

" _ No _ . Christ, why do you and Mr. Stark both jump to scaring the shit out of a high schooler?"

  
  
"Because we both know you won't."

  
  
Peter scoffs, somewhere between indignant and exasperated. "That's not even - it's not even that big of a deal. He's a jerk, yeah, but it's not a big thing."

  
  
"The look on your face when you got in the car said otherwise," Happy says, before he can think better of it. He doesn't want to push too hard and make Peter shut down, but again, it's a little too late.

  
  
Thankfully, Peter just sighs, fingers running through his hair. "I - it was just something he said earlier. I was already a little on edge today, and he...went a little too far. But I'm okay, Happy, really. You don't have to - I mean, I know you have better things to do than worry about me anyway, but -"

  
  
"I do worry about you. You have no regard for your own well-being, it's terrifying."

  
  
"I -"

  
  
"You're like another Tony, except Tony's a grown ass adult and you're like - fun-sized."

  
  
"I am not -"   


 

"You're tiny and have no sense of self-preservation, of course I worry about you."

  
  
"I didn't get in this car so you could insult me," Peter says, but he's smiling. There's still a sad tinge to his eyes, but he's smiling.

  
  
"I'm not insulting you, only stating facts."

  
  
"Lies. Lies and slander."

  
  
Happy laughs. "Sure, kid. Whatever you say."

  
  
The guilt doesn't lessen. But he thinks they're on the road to recovery.

**Author's Note:**

> all of these fics are written in literally a day (weird flex but ok) so like. go easy on me i'm tired
> 
> hmu on [tumblr](https://peter-parkerson.tumblr.com/)


End file.
